True Confidence: Part 4 - False Measures - Acquisitions

We continue our discussion on True Confidence (Part One, Part Two, Part Three)

False Measures of Confidence.

2. Acquisitions.

Robbreport_2Houses, Cars, HDTV's, Computers, iPhones, Boats, Motorcycles.

Some people determine value by their valuables.  Their self worth by their net worth.

Believe me, this is one I struggle with daily.

Psychology Today did a survey of over 20,000 people and 74% said that money is how we keep score in life.

If you believe this survey represents the attitude of America, that means that 3/4 of America derives their self worth from money.  A person value is tied to their car, house, the job they have, the status and circles they entertain and the amount of money they make.

Is this what we want to teach our children?

I have lived this first hand many times.  When I was a Financial Planner, I drove a Suzuki, though I was qualified and good at my job, many people judged me competence by the car I drove.

On the other hand, a friend of mine has a Salsa colored Lamborghini and everywhere we went, people would gawk and take pictures of his car. It felt pretty good to be next to him. Diablo_2

But God tells us a different story in Psalm 20:7

"Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God."

Now, don't get me wrong having nice things is fine.  My friend is a smart guy and worked hard for his car.  However, there is a fine line between having nice things and wanting those things to derive our own self worth. 

For some people their things may be clothes. 

A popular women's magazine asked it's readers what they do when they feel depressed or down?  The number one response: Go shopping. 

We all have our material weaknesses but the point is to set the example and teach our children where our real self worth is derived from. 

Proverbs 11:28 says:

"Whoever trusts in his riches will fall, but the righteous will thrive like a green leaf."  

True Confidence: Part 3 - False Measures - Appearance

We continue our discussion on True Confidence (Part One, Part Two)

False Measures of Confidence. 

There are many sticks we use to measure confidence falsely so I have summarized a few of the most popular ones.

1. Appearance.

MgrahamSome people get their value or self worth from what they see in the mirror, especially when we are young.  We value people's opinion of our physical appearance and try hard to improve and maintain that physical appearance. We pay vast amounts of money for plastic surgery, get our photos airbrushed and try to emulate the celebrities we see on TV.  Little do we know that those celebrities spend hours with professional hairdressers and makeup artists before they ever leave the house in the morning.

On a personal note, when I was younger, I worked as a contract manager for a top model management company.  The models and actors I worked with were some of the shallowest people I have ever met and they truly believed that their self worth was in their appearance.  I didn't last long in that industry.Elite_logo_partner_2

Ask people at a Health Club if they are there to look better or for their health? 

We spend billions of dollars chasing the illusion of beauty.

If women woke up tomorrow and were satisfied with their appearance, we would have a bigger economic crash than the current sub prime mortgage crisis! 

All joking aside, the Bible says that beauty is fleeting, why would we put our confidence in something that does not last? 

And even if we were blessed with the right genes to make us physically attractive, who are we to boast?

1 Corinthians 4:7 says

"For who makes you different from anyone else? What do you have that youdid not receive? And if you did receive it, why do you boast as thoughyou did not?"


Teachable Moments

In Proverbs and in James we read about being quick to listen and slow to speak.  As Fathers, this lesson becomes even more important.  In Ephesians 6:4 we read, "Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord."(NIV).  As we bring up our children in the ways of the Lord, we have to continually walk the way of a Spiritual Leader, first in our home and then in the Church and our communities.  Our wives and our children can testify to how Godly of a man that we are by the way we treat them.  A man that I respect very well, both in Christian and in business standards, once shared a story with me about one of his children.  I have to say that I could not have handled it the way that he handled it, but through prayer and faith I might have had a shot.  When he ended the story he said, "Don't be quick to anger and to discipline, instead, look for the teachable moments in life.  Because those will be the ones that they remember."  His son is a leader of the church and of his family as a Godly man.  As men we are constantly looking for the easy way to do things, solve things, invent things, etc., but with our children and our wives we have to quickly learn that it is an investment.  It is not just "quality" time, rather it's "quantity" that make the quality we desire.  Instead of reaching for the paddle or being quick to anger, look for those teachable moments in life when you can take a walk with them and show them that this is our Father's world.

IMG_0971

True Confidence: Part 2

In this post we continue to look at True Confidence and what having true confidence means.  As we said before, many times we put our confidence in worldly items or in our own works however Paul had a different opinion. 

"I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."  - Philippians 3:14   

SecretMost of the time when we hear the word Confidence it is usually preceded by the word "self".  Self Confidence.  The secular world tries to tell us that if we dig down deep, if we just discipline ourselves enough, if we just read another self-help book we'll figure it out on our own and conquer all of our problems. 

This type of thinking was the same thinking that led me to the most destructive and painful time in my life.  The truth is we don't need more self confidence, we need confidence in God.

"I can do all things..."

When I was a child I was told, you can do anything you want, you can be the President of the United States if you just work hard and believe in yourself.

Self-help books tell us to search deep inside, find our inner strength and we can succeed.

But the Bible tells us a different story, in Philippians Chapters 3-4.

Paul was trying to tell the church not to put there faith in false measures or in themselves. He even illustrates this in Philippians 3:3-6 by saying that by all their measures, he was an impressive man.  He was from the best tribe, he was a Pharisee and he was following God's laws better than most men.

Then Paul goes on further to say that all these worldly measures that impressed man so much he considered them rubbish next to knowing God.Strength

When you lose your job, when a loved one dies, when you lose thousands of dollars in one day because of the current financial crisis, you can't dig down deep inside and find strength in yourself?

All of the worlds measuring sticks and self-help lingo cannot help you when you put them up against eternity.

Instead, Paul tells them to put their confidence in a relationship with Jesus.

So the real question is where do our confidences lay?

Cart (0)