Duties of a Husband, Part I:
1 Peter 3:7 (New International Version)”Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.”
Simple Defintions:
con·sid·er·ate –adjective
1. showing kindly awareness or regard for another's feelings, circumstances, etc.: a very considerate critic. 2.carefully considered; deliberate. 3.marked by consideration or reflection; deliberate; prudent.
treat –verb (used with object)
1.to act or behave toward (a person) in some specified way: to treat someone with respect. 2. to consider or regard in a specified way, and deal with accordingly: to treat a matter as unimportant.
re·spect –noun
1.a particular, detail, or point (usually prec. by in ): to differ in some respect. 2.relation or reference: inquiries with respect to a route. 3. esteem for or a sense of the worth or excellence of a person, a personal quality or ability, or something considered as a manifestation of a personal quality or ability: I have great respect for her judgment. 4. deference to a right, privilege, privileged position, or someone or something considered to have certain rights or privileges; proper acceptance or courtesy; acknowledgment: respect for a suspect's right to counsel; to show respect for the flag; respect for the elderly. 5. the condition of being esteemed or honored: to be held in respect.
So what is Paul trying to say here? What does he mean by saying that if we don’t treat our wives with respect and we are not considerate of them, that are prayers will be hindered? Some of you may be saying here, “Now wait one cotton pickin minute.” “You mean to tell me that if my wife isn’t the easiest person to live with that I still have to do this or my prayers will be hindered?” One simple answer: YES
To put this in simpler terms, we are talking about Chivalry, consideration and companionship. I asked my wife what are some of the most important things to her in a relationship, and her answered really surprised me. She said, “feeling safe and having you as my best friend are some of the most important things to her.” I would have thought of a few other responses that I could have preferred, but when you look at the big picture and realize that the rest of the puzzle all fits perfectly into God’s plan, “Love one another!”
When you tear your wife down, when you disrespect her in front of her children and in public what kind of legacy are we leaving for our children’s children? I love the old adage, “Happy wife, Happy Life.” Does that statement mean that you have to turn in your man shoes and be a Eunuch in making your wife happy? By no means, if anything, just the opposite, I would say that when you center Christ in your life, then you center Christ in your marriage and then there will be Godly submission to you as a leader of your family and your role as spiritual leader of the house. Husbands (Fathers) have three principle roles in a Godly marriage: 1) Prophet 2) Priest 3) King of his household (book by Derek Prince, Husbands and Fathers). To put it another way, Husbands (Fathers) need to learn how to be the Head of the House, How to love his wife and how to take care of his family. If you love your kids, then love their mother!
Did you know the English word, Husband, comes from an old word which we might spell house-band, which means a strip of metal or rope used to join or hold things together. Note: The entire household depends on the man. (Article, Duties of a Husband). The Bible says that he who finds a wife finds a good thing (Proverbs). Our roles of a husband/father should be as what Christ did for the Church (Ephesians 5). We should love our wives just as we love our own bodies (we eat, we drink, we play, we work – we take care of our bodies).
Now before you go to much farther patting yourself on the back, if you consider yourself a good Husband/Father, let’s read Malachi 2:15 (NIV), “So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth.” Did you catch that, do you see what I see? Let me put it this way, P O R N O G R A P H Y. Does that word say anything to you? Do you have images that are flashed before your very eyes just reading that word? Maybe you have another window open that has ungodly images on the desktop computer screen? If so, SHAME ON US! For God is not mocked! Our bodies are a holy temple of God, which houses the Holy Spirit in each and every one of us. Job 31:1 puts it this way: “I have made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at another woman.” Let me ask you this question, How can you expect your wives to submit to your authority when you will not submit to God’s? HMMMM? Think about that for a few minutes and then do us all a favor, REPENT, for God is a Holy God.
When we yield to pornography (which by the way, is one of the biggest epidemics in the Christian world) you sin against God and your corrupt your heart and flame the sinful nature that is in all of us. “Sin, of course, causes a man to exploit a woman, to become a predator, to prey upon her, to abuse her, to take advantage of her, to turn this Word of God into tyranny. Sin perverts, and God will judge those who pervert His Word.” Are you leading, protecting, nurturing, cherishing her, even as the Lord cares for His bride, the Church? (Rev. Carl Haak, The Reformed Witness Hour).
So let me ask you this question: When are you going to get serious about being a Legacy Dad? When are you going to get serious about the junk that is in your proverbial closet of sin? When are you going to treat and respect your wife like the woman that she is – A child and daughter of the King of Kings?
God loves you and me! God is a God of second chances! God has given us his son who has paid for all of our sins – once and for all. All we have to do is confess this to him and ask him to be Lord over us.
Come on men, the enemy is flanking us, our walls are breached, our morals are sinking and evil lurks around the corner. Where are the righteous men who do not flee from danger? If God is for us, then who can be against us?
