The Portrait of a Real Man

real mean liveGenesis 18:19 (NIV) 19 For I have chosen him, so that he will direct his children and his household after him to keep the way of the Lord by doing what is right and just, so that the Lord will bring about for Abraham what he has promised him.”According to Dr. Tony Evans, there are four things that contribute to the portrait of a real man:

  1. A real man has a sense of Divine Destiny
  2. A real man has a responsibility to disciple the future of his wheelhouse (his children, his wife and his family)
  3. A real man has dignity
  4. A real man has a sense of dominion (in charge-ness)

Appropriate Scripture to manhood:

James 1:27 (NIV) 27 Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.

Job 29:7-17 (ESV)

7 When I went out to the gate of the city,

when I prepared my seat in the square,

8 the young men saw me and withdrew,

and the aged rose and stood;

9 the princes refrained from talking

and laid their hand on their mouth;

10 the voice of the nobles was hushed,

and their tongue stuck to the roof of their mouth.

11 When the ear heard, it called me blessed,

and when the eye saw, it approved,

12 because I delivered the poor who cried for help,

and the fatherless who had none to help him.

13 The blessing of him who was about to perish came upon me,

and I caused the widow's heart to sing for joy.

14 I put on righteousness, and it clothed me;

my justice was like a robe and a turban.

15 I was eyes to the blind

and feet to the lame.

16 I was a father to the needy,

and I searched out the cause of him whom I did not know.

17 I broke the fangs of the unrighteous

and made him drop his prey from his teeth.

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Divine Destiny is knowing that God is in control of it all and he has plans for you and I, plans to prosper you and I (this is not the prosperity gospel, rather the biblical definition of the abundant life) and that on this earth we have a purpose to worship the Lord and to give all praise, honor and glory to Him.

We have to disciple others - our children, men and boys around us and those that God has given to us.

A real man has dignity - has character, has integrity and is bearing the fruit of the Spirit.

A real man knows his place on this earth and knows that God is over everything (even his problems).  If you put a bible in this man of God, you will see dominion.

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Dr. Tony Evans references this fight in where Rocky remembers all of his fights and cannot get back up until he sees (and remembers) his deceased coach and hears Mickey say "get up you bum, because Mickey loves you"  Because Rocky remembered someone who died and whorose again (in his memory) and overcame all the doubt and all the pain and all the defeat and told him he could do it.  Referring this to Jesus - Dr. Evans says that Rocky found power that he did not have because he remembered someone who died who came back to life to tell us he loves us.

When in doubt - be the man who God wants you to be.  Trust in the Lord with all of your heart, lean not on your own understanding, acknowledge him in all of your ways and he will make your paths straight.

 

Blessings,Dante

 

My Prayers may be hindered? Say wha???

husbands1 Peter 3:7New International Version (NIV)

Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.

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Some reflections that should make you (a legacy dad) reflect

  • "you mean, if I disrespect my wife, God won't answer my prayers?"
  • "you mean, if I am not considerate with my wife, God won't answer my prayers?"
  • "you mean, some actions that I take that do not honor God's will for my life, my hinder my prayers?"

If there is something in your life right now (if you are a legacy dad, or for that matter a legacy mom, who is reading this entry) then change that behavior right now!  Ask God to forgive you for doing it your way and not His way and submit to His will for your life.

If there is a root of bitterness in your life or your spouses life, confess that to God (don't condemn the spouse and say that you are righteous and you are holy and tell them how to live) Change the way that you react, you disrespect and you life and follow God's ways:  Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness and self-control - these are the fruit of the Spirit and let God and let go of self promotion.

If you are, however, doing these things that God calls us to do, then bless you my brother (and my sister).  For God so loves you!

Happy Friday!

Blessings,

Dante

Why the Church

Faith ChurchWhen you think about life, the Bible and God's plan for us, it is amazing to think and believe that God chose us.  God chooses to use us to build His kingdom.  God chooses us to share his love.  God chooses us to share His Son, Jesus Christ, to the world.  We are called by the Son to go and make disciples unto all the world.  Remember the important narrative here in that God chooses us!In His wonderful creation and word, God shows us the importance of community.  After all, in the beginning God created (the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit) everything.  The older I get the more I see man's hypothesis and science give way to the Truth, to the Way and to the life given to us by God the Father.  God shows us the importance of community by Himself, His Son and His Spirit who are three-in-one and one-in-three.  That is a concept that is way above my understanding, yet when you test it against the truth in Scripture that is the only way that it could be.  God gives us community by the living, breathing, and awe-inspiring love that He has for us.

Ephesians 3:9-10 (ESV)  9 and to bring to light for everyone what is the plan of the mystery hidden for ages in[a] God who created all things, 10 so that through the church the manifold wisdom of God might now be made known to the rulers and authorities in the heavenly places.

Hebrews 10:24-25 (ESV) 24 And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, 25 not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.

Community is a very important part of God's mission.   God made us to be in community, we crave community.  He exemplifies true community in the Holy Trinity.  He wants to model this some community in the Church, the body of Christ.  We are to love each other and to continue to do good to each other in brotherly (and sisterly( love).  The more that we let the Spirit bless us with His fruit (for the Fruit of the Spirit is: Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self-Control).  This is fruit that should pour out of our lives, in community, when we bear the name Jesus as Savior.

What we believeWhen Jesus was on this earth he exemplified this model to us all through walking with His disciples and having them walk with others along the way.  Remember, in the Gospels, that there was a point where Jesus sends out the disciples two by two and Scripture reveals to us that there are 70 disciples plus the twelve with Jesus.  Where did these 70 come from?   The answer is simple:  Through community.

Do you remember where Jesus is talking to Peter about the church and references him in regards to on this rock, he will build His church.  This is not a reference to any specific religion, rather, this is referencing the Church - God's church.

When we are in community and doing God's will, then we can see His purpose and wonderful path that he has for each and everyone of us.  How can we do this:

Be in community

Serve together

Share God's love story together

Read the Bible daily

Pray often

Walk with other brothers (if you are a man) and with other sisters (if you are a woman)

In all you do, do in love and forgiving each other (in the church) as God has forgiven you

Love one another

In all you do, Coram Deo.

Blessings,

Dante

Post Conference - Act Like Men....now what....?

Lance and I walked away from this conference with about 75 other men from our churches and men's group along with 4,000 other men around many churches and we were not disappointed. Both he and I were affirmed in a good portion of our walk, convicted in some other parts that we have to sharpen up and work on and left wanting in some other areas.  Pastor James spoke on 1 Peter Chapter 3 (so did we a while ago - check this out on How to Build Up Your Wives).  This past weekend in my church's men's group, two of our facilitators talked about marriage and convictions and confessions of past sins that separated us from our wives and God's holiness, meaning these struggles need to be confessed and repented of, which would allow God's Spirit to work through us.1peter1

1 Peter 3 English Standard Version (ESV)

Wives and Husbands

Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct. Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious. For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.

Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you[a] of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

Reasons why we need to get our house (our bodies, which are temples of God) in order"

  • God calls us to be holy (Read Colossians 3, Read Romans 12)
  • God wants us to read his word daily
  • God wants a relationship with us (this implies a two way street)
  • God wants us to lead our wives (and families)
  • God calls us to testify about Him, His Son, His words and His good news
  • God calls us to teach and preach to others to repent and turn away from sin (all variations of, which doesn't give us a right to be hypocritical)
  • God call us to treat His daughters (our wives) with respect and as heirs to His kingdom (so that our prayers will not be hindered)
  • The world is spinning out of control - this doesn't mean that we have to compromise biblical truth

What are some things that you and I need to be honest about?  Where can we go from here?  What does God require of us today?  Likely if you are reading this blog, then you have been elsewhere on the internet.  Your time is being pulled from you daily.  Is everything we do Coram Deo?  Is God over everything in our lives?  If not, why not?

What are some changes you and I can make today in our families, our work, our church and our walks?

What are you waiting for?

Blessings,

D

Some takeaways from ActLikeMen2015

Lance and I will be posting our takes and viewpoints on all the material covered at Act Like Men 2015 this past weekend over the next few weeks.Once again, the theme verse was:  1 Corinthians 16:13-  (ESV) 13 Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong. 14 Let all that you do be done in love.

ALM1

Legacy Dad sponsored the event and we got to talk to a lot of men and churches that wanted to know what Legacy Dad can do for them.  At one point, I had a pastor come up and ask me for the two-minute elevator speech of what we are about.   Instead of responding to that question, I kindly asked this kind pastor what were some of the most important things to teach children and his men.  This led to a very good talk and he was very interested in what Legacy Dad could do for his church and men (we look forward to the opportunity).

Pastor Eric Mason opened the conference up on the preview of what this conference would bring and did he bring it.  He shared from his heart and talked about some shakeable faith moments in his life that would rock any of our faith foundations to its core and have us ask whom do we serve and whom do we believe after this moments.  He didn't fail us in his delivery and his heart in sharing the gospel.

Pastor James Macdonald, in our opinion, always does a stellar job and is consistent in message and in his heartfelt desire for men, women and children to grow in their Faith.  We love to hear this man of God preach and to teach - it was our joy to hear his compassion shine for men this past weekend and for the weeks and months and years to come.  Pastor James opened the conference up on the first theme of Being Watchful and he also shared the Gospel and we witnessed hundreds of men committing (and re-committing their lives) to Jesus.  Pastor James really brought his gifts to the pulpit and delivered a heart-felt piercing message for men to examine themselves and to see where they are at in their faith.  Pastor James also talked on Saturday on the them of Being Strong and what that looks like in a disciples life.  This message came in the Saturday part of the conference and, once again, Pastor James nailed it.

Saturday morning continued right up the proverbial flagpole with Pastor Matt Chandler preaching on the them of Standing Firm and not backing down from our faith (I will post on these themes later).  He shared his past and his genealogy with us and where he came from.  He shared his struggles in parenting and the difficulties of life that come in the way of discipleship.  Pastor Matt has endured a lot of faith shaking moments in his life (as have I) and he really was honest to the core in his delivery.  He really challenged the men to own up to their faith and to make the stand in their faith.  We were truly blessed by these three men.

Pastor Eric Mason closed the conference on the theme of Let all that you do be done in love.  This was definitely some interesting twists and turns on this that were very applicable for me in my walk.  I really appreciated Pastor Eric this year.  Lance was telling me that he used some of his Video series with his men at his church.

One of my most special moments of the entire conference was the lunch time on Saturday Morning.  Lance and I brought 3 churches of men together and catered lunch for them all.  We all ate and socialized and chatted for the first half our of our hour and a half lunch break.  The next hour was when the Spirit moved in all of our lives.  Lance and I had everyone get into a big circle facing each other and we started with some ground rules:  1) when you wanted to talk, state your name and share with the group being watchful with your time so other guys could share 2) before you began sharing the entire group would welcome you to our forum by saying Hi ______) 3) Once you were finished thanking the guys for sharing or saying that's all 4) the rest of the guys saying thank you to the person sharing and stating their name.

What surprised me most, was that this was not a small group by any means, as there were almost 50 in attendance, was the fact that just about everyone in the room did share and opened up about what the conference (What God, the Holy Spirit and Jesus) were saying to them. This was sacred ground because men were sharing, men were accountable and men were opening up to other men about real life issues, challenges and struggles.  It was so special that I had to remind that men that this was sacred and that anything that was said in that room stays in that room unless the person sharing gave permission to share.

It was at this point, that I am reminded to those of you that would ask what Legacydad.com can do for you and what our men's ministry can do for you - it's this.  It is setting up an environment for you to read God's word, worship together, share together and do life together.  It is a place to where we share with you insights that work for us and that are constantly evolving as men, culture and struggles in life change daily.  It is being real and relational with other men.

Lance and I are humbled by those of you that have reached out to us this past weekend and shared what our blog has done for you, what it will continue to do for you and how we can continue to meet your needs through the days, months and years to come.  For those of you that want us to engage your church and your men, your marriages and your family ministries we say, "To God be the Glory forever and ever amen."

Thank you for taking the time that you spend with us via website, in person or in ministry.

Blessings to you all,

Dante & Lance

Esse quam videriCorum Deo

 

 

Lessons learned from Timothy

FOCUS ON:1 TIMOTHY

1:15 The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the foremost. 16 But I received mercy for this reason, that in me, as the foremost, Jesus Christ might display his perfect patience as an example to those who were to believe in him for eternal life. (IT IS ALL ABOUT JESUS)

6:6 But godliness with contentment is great gain, 7 for we brought nothing into the world, and[c] we cannot take anything out of the world. 8 But if we have food and clothing, with these we will be content. (BE CONTENT)

 

Timothy

ACTION STEPS:

1 TIMOTHY2: 2 First of all, then, I urge that supplications, prayers, intercessions, and thanksgivings be made for all people (PRAY ALWAYS)

2:8 I desire then that in every place the men should pray, lifting holy hands without anger or quarreling; 9 likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control,

4:7 Have nothing to do with irreverent, silly myths. Rather train yourself for godliness;

4:15 Practice these things, immerse yourself in them,[c] so that all may see your progress. 16 Keep a close watch on yourself and on the teaching. Persist in this, for by so doing you will save both yourself and your hearers. (PRACTICE WHAT YOU PREACH)

5:1 Do not rebuke an older man but encourage him as you would a father, younger men as brothers, 2 older women as mothers, younger women as sisters, in all purity.  3 Honor widows who are truly widows. (RESPECT OTHERS REGARDLESS OF POSITION OR TITLE)

5:22 Do not be hasty in the laying on of hands, nor take part in the sins of others; keep yourself pure. (DISCERN)

6:11 But as for you, O man of God, flee these things. Pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, steadfastness, gentleness. 12 Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called and about which you made the good confession in the presence of many witnesses.

6:17 As for the rich in this present age, charge them not to be haughty, nor to set their hopes on the uncertainty of riches, but on God, who richly provides us with everything to enjoy. 18 They are to do good, to be rich in good works, to be generous and ready to share, 19 thus storing up treasure for themselves as a good foundation for the future, so that they may take hold of that which is truly life.

FOCUS ON:

2 Timothy

2:11 The saying is trustworthy, for:  If we have died with him, we will also live with him; 12 if we endure, we will also reign with him; if we deny him, he also will deny us; 13 if we are faithless, he remains faithful— for he cannot deny himself. (IT'S ALL ABOUT JESUS)

3:3 But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. 2 For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, 4 treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, 5 having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. Avoid such people.

ACTION STEPS:2 Timothy

2:1 You then, my child, be strengthened by the grace that is in Christ Jesus, 2 and what you have heard from me in the presence of many witnesses entrust to faithful men[a] who will be able to teach others also.

22 So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 23 Have nothing to do with foolish, ignorant controversies; you know that they breed quarrels. 24 And the Lord's servant[e] must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, 25 correcting his opponents with gentleness. God may perhaps grant them repentance leading to a knowledge of the truth, 26 and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, after being captured by him to do his will.

4:2 preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and exhort, with complete patience and teaching.

Blessings,

Dante

Here's What's Wrong with Manhood

I respect my wife and serve her every chance I get, I love my child like I've never loved anyone before, I give my time and money to organizations I believe in, but I'm not much of a man (or so society seems to think). Here's why:I'm not a big sports guy. Motor sports, yes. The typical "ball in play" sports, not so much. I can't tell you how awkward it feels when I'm at work in the morning and people are talking about the game the previous day.

"What do you think about the game, Scott?"

*Awkward silence and crickets*

Me: "I like Formula 1 and Moto GP..."

bodybuilder-646482_1280

This is when the crowd dissipates quicker than people headed to the local pancake house after Sunday service.

I own guns, but it has been years since I went hunting. I didn't grow up doing it. At the time of this writing it has been over 6 years since I climbed a tree stand. I wouldn't even know what to do with a deer, or any other animal for that matter, if I ended up getting a lucky shot. No idea how to clean those things.

So What Gives?

I'm not coming to you as an axe wielding, lumber jack beard sporting manly man. Sure, I have a beard but it's nothing compared to Brian Wilson (a reference that I, sadly, had to Google).

What I am writing to you as, though, is a man who realizes he is broken and who needs to find his masculinity in something greater than what team I follow, how much meat I bagged during last season, or what the latest trend says that a man should be.

That "something" I speak of is the man I use as my model and whom I strive daily to be like.

Christ has modeled for us what it means to be a man. I have yet to see any public figure show the humility and service that Christ has.

"You can't polish a turd."

This is a phrase that I constantly heard during my time in the service. It may sound crass, but it has a good meaning behind it. To relate it to this topic, I want us to realize that you may be able to dress a man up and give him all the riches in the world but it's what's inside that really matters.

If a man isn't right on the inside, no matter how much you polish him up on the outside, you're not going to make him a good leader, mentor, father, etc.

Who Are You Really Trying To Impress?

It seems like the definition of manhood changes as each generation passes. How we've gotten to the era of skinny jeans, I'll never know, but that's another story. Regardless, we should refuse to be defined by what's popular.

Paul addressed this very thing in his letter to the Romans, stating, "And do not be conformed to this world (or age), but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove (or approve) what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect." - Romans, 12:2 (NASB).

Let us constantly remember to keep our eyes on Christ and to use Him as our example of true manhood. Newsflash: You're always going to fall short of this! However, if you dedicate yourselves to constantly chasing after God and what pleases Him then I'll tell you that you've already got a leg up over the next guy who is trying to chase the newest trend.

Question to Think About: 

-       Have you ever stopped to think who your real role model is?

 

This was guest post by Scott Friend

Scott J. Friend Get more of Scott's great insights at his site - The Business of Relationships

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