Good Friday is Good because Sunday is coming!!!

Isaiah 53English Standard Version (ESV) 53 Who has believed what he has heard from us?[a] And to whom has the arm of the Lord been revealed? 2 For he grew up before him like a young plant, and like a root out of dry ground; he had no form or majesty that we should look at him, and no beauty that we should desire him. 3 He was despised and rejected[b] by men, a man of sorrows[c] and acquainted with[d] grief;[e] and as one from whom men hide their faces[f] he was despised, and we esteemed him not. 4 Surely he has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows; yet we esteemed him stricken, smitten by God, and afflicted. 5 But he was pierced for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace, and with his wounds we are healed. 6 All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned—every one—to his own way; and the Lord has laid on him the iniquity of us all. 7 He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth; like a lamb that is led to the slaughter, and like a sheep that before its shearers is silent, so he opened not his mouth. 8 By oppression and judgment he was taken away; and as for his generation, who considered that he was cut off out of the land of the living, stricken for the transgression of my people? 9 And they made his grave with the wicked and with a rich man in his death, although he had done no violence, and there was no deceit in his mouth. 10 Yet it was the will of the Lord to crush him; he has put him to grief;[g] when his soul makes[h] an offering for guilt, he shall see his offspring; he shall prolong his days; the will of the Lord shall prosper in his hand. 11 Out of the anguish of his soul he shall see[i] and be satisfied; by his knowledge shall the righteous one, my servant, make many to be accounted righteous, and he shall bear their iniquities. 12 Therefore I will divide him a portion with the many,[j] and he shall divide the spoil with the strong,[k] because he poured out his soul to death and was numbered with the transgressors; yet he bore the sin of many, and makes intercession for the transgressors. 

Jesus, the King and Messiah left glory for our sake (those who He has called by name and trust in His saving and finishing work on the Cross) to be born of a virgin, to live on this earth for 33 short years and to fulfill EVERY prophecy ever written in Scripture about Him and then to be turned over to sinners in the darkest hour and be crucified for our sake.  He endured loneliness, beatings, sneering, excruciating crucifixion and conquered death for our sake.  He prophesied about his death and resurrection and conquered death for our sin - to be the perfect atonement for our wrongdoing.

Tomorrow, Easter Sunday, we celebrate not only the death but the resurrection of the Living Son, who reigns, Jesus Christ!!!

Matthew 20:17-19English Standard Version (ESV)

Jesus Foretells His Death a Third Time 17 And as Jesus was going up to Jerusalem, he took the twelve disciples aside, and on the way he said to them, 18 “See, we are going up to Jerusalem. And the Son of Man will be delivered over to the chief priests and scribes, and they will condemn him to death 19 and deliver him over to the Gentiles to be mocked and flogged and crucified, and he will be raised on the third day.”

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John 12:23-25English Standard Version (ESV)

23 And Jesus answered them, “The hour has come for the Son of Man to be glorified. 24 Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit. 25 Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.

Luke 24:6-7English Standard Version (ESV)

6 He is not here, but has risen. Remember how he told you, while he was still in Galilee, 7 that the Son of Man must be delivered into the hands of sinful men and be crucified and on the third day rise.”

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Luke 24:1-12English Standard Version (ESV)

The Resurrection24 But on the first day of the week, at early dawn, they went to the tomb, taking the spices they had prepared. 2 And they found the stone rolled away from the tomb, 3 but when they went in they did not find the body of the Lord Jesus. 4 While they were perplexed about this, behold, two men stood by them in dazzling apparel. 5 And as they were frightened and bowed their faces to the ground, the men said to them, “Why do you seek the living among the dead? 6 He is not here, but has risen. Remember how he told you, while he was still in Galilee, 7 that the Son of Man must be delivered into the hands of sinful men and be crucified and on the third day rise.” 8 And they remembered his words, 9 and returning from the tomb they told all these things to the eleven and to all the rest. 10 Now it was Mary Magdalene and Joanna and Mary the mother of James and the other women with them who told these things to the apostles, 11 but these words seemed to them an idle tale, and they did not believe them. 12 But Peter rose and ran to the tomb; stooping and looking in, he saw the linen cloths by themselves; and he went home marveling at what had happened.

When a boy turns thirteen....

This past February, my oldest son turned 13.  I only really have 5 more critical years to pass the torch of boyhood to manhood.  When Lance and I and Gary first met face to face many years ago we had in depth conversations about this very thing.  Going back there, in my mind, recently reminded me at that time how ill-equipped that I was for this journey with my son and my wife and I with our daughters.Don't get me wrong, my wife and I are equally yoked and we are doing a lot of things that are good and godly and teaching accountability and responsibility, but I think that I was out of my league when I listened to Gary and Lance talk about this plan and path that they had for their grandsons and son, respectively.  Needless to say, I did a lot of soul searching and planning for this with my son during that trip and the time since.

Anyway, my son and I had the first, of what I pray is many, a conversation about this journey from boyhood to manhood and what are some things that are to come.  From reading some books, to watching some movies, to taking some trips and facing some fears along the way, I cannot wait to see how he responds and for what God has planned for him.

I am so thankful that I do not have to do this alone.  I am thankful for Lance and Gary and for men of faith that I can walk with and talk to and lean on God and not my own understanding in all this.  If you scour this website you can see stages and even find Lance's plan with his son along the way.

Dennis Rainey, of Famly Life, posted this picture on Facebook and just hit such a positive emotion in me.  It is scary, as a parent, to realize that age 13 that you only have 5 years left before they are off on their own for college, manhood and the rest of their life.  Don't get me wrong, my wife and I will always be a part of our kids life.

Proverbs 22:6English Standard Version (ESV)

6 Train up a child in the way he should go;even when he is old he will not depart from it.

This Scripture does not mean that your child will not face trial and tribulation, because if they are a follower of Jesus, then they will face trial and they will face tribulation.

I am excited to take this journey with my boy.  I am excited for the journey that my wife will have with our daughters.

God is good, all the time, God is good.

Blessings,

Dante

 

What I know I should do, I do not

Romans 8:12-17English Standard Version (ESV)Heirs with Christ12 So then, brothers,[a] we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh. 13 For if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live. 14 For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons[b] of God. 15 For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!” 16 The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, 17 and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him.

Colossians 3:5-8English Standard Version (ESV)

5 Put to death therefore what is earthly in you:[a] sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. 6 On account of these the wrath of God is coming.[b] 7 In these you too once walked, when you were living in them. 8 But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth.

Why is it so hard to understand some of the things of God?  Why do people try to dilute the Gospel to please the ways of men?  I guess when it is all said and done, I struggle with my sin that God has saved me from.  I know I am a sinner.  I know that my sins have separated me from the love of God.  That is, to say, until I came to know Jesus Christ as Lord.  I was once lost, but now I am found through Christ Jesus who died brutally on a cross for my sin and for your if you confess His name and believe that he was born of a virgin, lived a perfect life, died on a cross and rose again from the dead you will be saved.  Confession is good for the soul.  The hardest thing to wrap my head around is that I still struggle with my fleshly desires.  The difference is that I no longer desire to please my selfish flesh, but to try to please God.  Yet I still succumb to pride and to sin.  I confess this sin to God and to my brothers (Men of Faith) and know that God, through His Son, Jesus Christ, has given me the perfect sacrifice for my soul and my sins of the past, present and future are covered by Him.

This being said, I still wonder and test and seek the truth that is found in Scripture.  For instance, why does it tell us, who are saved and covered forever by the Blood of Jesus Christ, to work out our salvation with fear and trembling?  Why does it say in the New Testament that those of us who give in to the flesh will not inherit the Kingdom of God?  Why does it tell me to put to death the earthly desires of the flesh?  Does the Gospel offend?  Are we to call out sin or just always show grace?  Where is the balance in this?

Why does Scripture tell us to renew our mind?  Why does it tell us to pursue holiness?  Why does Scripture tell us to repent?  Why does the cross have to be so violent?  Why did God have to send His only Son to die for our sins and to be beaten and tortured and crucified for our sins?  Does God hate sin that much?

These are things that I wrestle with.  These are some of the things that I am diligently searching God's word for and looking for his direction of which way to go in the leadership of my family and His ministry.

Repent!  For the Kingdom of God is at hand!

Examine yourselves to see if you are still in the faith?

Pursue holiness and flee any form of sexual immorality.

Pray for me,

 

D

 

 

Magnify

mag·ni·fy  verb  "extol; glorify." "praise the Lord and magnify Him"Psalm 34: English Standard Version (ESV)

3 Oh, magnify the Lord with me,and let us exalt his name together!

If you were to examine your life (your walk) this past week, ask yourself to take inventory in all that you do.  That is, to say, when you wake, work, eat, play, sleep and interact with others where does the Lord stand in your life?  Is God the Father, The Son and The Spirit the authority in your life, in all that you do?  Are you using your time, your talent and your treasure that you have been given by God in ways to honor Him?  Are you focusing more on what you want and how you want to promote your Kingdom instead of God's Kingdom.

For me, this is a daily struggle.  If I am brutally honest, there are days when I wake that I want to just roll over and sleep all day.  Or there are days that I just want to do life for me and my indulgences.  There are days that I just want to be selfish and not look out for others that God has given me to steward over.  

I was talking to our Care Pastor after Men of Faith yesterday, we both went out for breakfast yesterday and instead of the whole group of guys, it was just him and I.  It was really a great conversation and I truly enjoy this man of God who has been serving God's Kingdom since 1983.  When you meet him and his wife you truly see two servants that understand what it means to turn it back toward God.  They serve not to "check boxes" rather they do it to magnify God's glory.  So I was telling him that sometimes I feel so overwhelmed by what God has done for us, sending his Son to die on a cross to cover all of my sins.  I told him that I feel a deep sorrow and compassion for those who do not know him on their day of judgement and that their names that will not be written in God's Book of Life.

I also talked about the other question that we, who are truly Christ-Followers, will have to give an account:  What did we do with all the things that God has given us (His Time, His treasure and His talent).  Did our lives magnify His Glory.  Please don't take this as a condemnation or as a blog where Lance and I are trying to condemn you, the reader.  Quite the contrary.  This is an indictment toward us more than you.  I am an Elder of our Church, the leader of our Men's Group and Family Man that is given the charge to rear my children in the ways of the Lord.  I do not take this question toward you, rather, toward my daily walk.

There are days, months and even seasons where I can honestly tell you that I do get it and that I do magnify God.  But if I am really honest with you, then I feel like I have to share that I feel that there are more days were I am losing the battle against my old sin nature and the ways of the Evil One, who is a liar, and who is seeking to destroy everything good in my life.  He would love nothing more than for me to exist and to gratify my earthly desires - he wins over my life when I do this.  Or to fall in temptation and give in to it - he wins over my life.  Or to self-indulge in my old sin nature - he wins over my life.  A lot of times I hear this silent voice in my life that would say words like, "you hypocrite"  "you fake"  "you're a liar" and "nice CHRISTian example - way to lead your life and your family".  Over the younger years of my life, I would cave and retreat and fall back into that wretched part of my life.  These days, God has given me a stronger understanding of His Word and His love for me that is unmatched by anyone in this Universe.  I say to this silent voice, "Guilty!  Guilty of all that you are accusing me of, BUT I am covered by the blood of Jesus Christ.

That means that all of my sins of my past, my present and my future are covered by His Blood.  That means oh silent voice and accuser of my sins in my life that God has won, death no longer has victory over my life.  Sin no longer can hold me because Jesus has paid for it all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What I wrestle with today is whether my life is magnifying the Lord in all that I do.  Am I being a good steward with all that I do?  I find consolation in that most of the time, I am broken and that I am a sinner and am broken and need daily repentance in my life to continue to make God the authority in my life that I know He is.  I have to ask for wisdom and guidance in all that I do.  Yes, I can be selfish and sinful, but I can ask brothers that I am walking with and my best friend (my wife) to hold me accountable:  Are my actions meeting my daily walk required by God.

Where do I find this in Scripture you ask:

Examine yourself:  2 Corinthians 13:5(ESV) 5 Examine yourselves, to see whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves. Or do you not realize this about yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you?—unless indeed you fail to meet the test!

Renew yourself:  Romans 12:1-2 (ESV) A Living Sacrifice 12 I appeal to you therefore, brothers,[a] by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship.[b] 2 Do not be conformed to this world,[c] but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.[d]

Pursue God's Holy Living (only capable thru complete trust and obedience in Him and His Word):  Colossians 3 (ESV) Put On the New Self 3 If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. 2 Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. 3 For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. 4 When Christ who is your[a] life appears, then you also will appear with him in glory. 5 Put to death therefore what is earthly in you:[b] sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. 6 On account of these the wrath of God is coming.[c] 7 In these you too once walked, when you were living in them. 8 But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth. 9 Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self[d] with its practices 10 and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. 11 Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave,[e] free; but Christ is all, and in all. 12 Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, 13 bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. 14 And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. 15 And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. 16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. 17 And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

Psalm 34: English Standard Version (ESV)

3 Oh, magnify the Lord with me,and let us exalt his name together!

Let us come together and reason with one another.  This life is but a vapor?  What do you want to echo in eternity:  Did I live for my self or for a higher purpose (God's will)?

Blessings,

D

 

 

 

 

What is truth?

John 8:31-32New International Version (NIV)31 Jesus said, “If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. 32 Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”


Jesus said that He is the Way, the Truth and the Life.  He said that no one will come to His Father, but through Him.

If you do no know Jesus as Lord, as Savior and as your redeemer, then the truth is not in you


If you do not know truth (the Lord Jesus), then when you die, you will be asked if you know the Lord, Jesus Christ as Savior.  If you do, then your name will be written in the Book of Life.  If you do not, then you will be thrown into the Lake of Fire that was intended for the Devil and his angels.


If you know the Lord as Savior and Friend and as your redeemer, then you will be asked another question....

 

I believe it will be asked like this:  What did you do with the things that I gave you?  The time, the talent and the treasure that God gave you?  Were you a good steward?  Did you spend it wisely, stewardship His Kingdom.  Was His will done?

Truth - Being in God's Will!

Blessings,D

 

 

What you permit, you promote

Matthew 12:33-37New International Version (NIV)33 “Make a tree good and its fruit will be good, or make a tree bad and its fruit will be bad, for a tree is recognized by its fruit. 34 You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of. 35 A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him. 36 But I tell you that everyone will have to give account on the day of judgment for every empty word they have spoken. 37 For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.”

This past Saturday, I led our men's group (Men of Faith) and focused on the question of what matters to God.  I read some scripture in the Book of Psalms and the Book of Job.  Over the past week and a half, I attended two funeral services.  One was for an Uncle and the other was for the father of my Senior Pastor.  I was impressed by the legacy that these men lead both in their families and in their community.  The eulogies among friend and family in both services were very touching and from the heart.  These men said words that they believed and were true about these men who are in Heaven today.

The other two things that I talked about was when my wife was really sick 8 years ago and we almost lost her as her body was approaching renal failure.  I had very young kids at the time and couldn't believe what was happening to me and asked God if this was His plan for me?  I prayed, I cried and I wrestled in confession and prayer to our Heavenly Father.  After several days (5 days) in all, the night before my wife would come back home to me and my kids, I finally prayed in a pool of tears that I trust God and that if His will was for Him to take my wife home to Him, then I trust Him and His will.  I let go of my wife and gave her to Him.  She's your's Lord - your will be done.  The very next morning, the prayer team called and my mother-in-law and I both had this unbelievable peace - the Peace of Christ.

The other eternity thinking event that happened in my life was when I was diagnosed with malignant melanoma twelve years ago.  I have been cancer free since that day, but my doctor is quick to point out that I am in the 5% chance camp of this type of cancer rearing its ugly head through my eyes and or my brain - meaning that it has 5% chance to come back this way to me.  Both this cancer and my wife and her health issues many years ago has kept an eternal grasp about how quick our lives will be.

I then asked the Men of Faith:  "For those of us in this room that will die we will have two questions to ask:

Question #1 - Do we know God's Son, The Lord Jesus Christ, as our Savior (is our name written in the Book of Life).  Have we truly surrendered to God's will and turned away from our sins?  Have we put the old self to death (this is a daily battle) and put on our new self.  Scripture tells us to examine ourselves closely to make sure that we are still in the Faith.  The beginning of Wisdom is the fear of the Lord.

Question #2 - What have we, those of us who are saved, done with what God has given us?   Have we been good stewards of His time, His talent that He gave us and His treasure that He has given us stewardship over.

  • Scripture on Time:  Psalm 90:12 ESV "So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom."
  • Scripture on Talent: 1 Peter 4:10-11 (NIV) 10 Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. 11 If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen."
  • Scripture on Treasure:  Malachi 3:6-10New International Version (NIV) Breaking Covenant by Withholding Tithes 6 “I the Lord do not change. So you, the descendants of Jacob, are not destroyed. 7 Ever since the time of your ancestors you have turned away from my decrees and have not kept them. Return to me, and I will return to you,” says the Lord Almighty.  “But you ask, ‘How are we to return?’ 8 “Will a mere mortal rob God? Yet you rob me. “But you ask, ‘How are we robbing you?’ “In tithes and offerings. 9 You are under a curse—your whole nation—because you are robbing me. 10 Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this,” says the Lord Almighty, “and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store it.    Mark 12:41-44New International Version (NIV) The Widow’s Offering 41 Jesus sat down opposite the place where the offerings were put and watched the crowd putting their money into the temple treasury. Many rich people threw in large amounts. 42 But a poor widow came and put in two very small copper coins, worth only a few cents. 43 Calling his disciples to him, Jesus said, “Truly I tell you, this poor widow has put more into the treasury than all the others. 44 They all gave out of their wealth; but she, out of her poverty, put in everything—all she had to live on.”

After we die, we will have a judgement of our souls.  Those of us that know the Lord as Savior will have his sacrifice and his blood poured over our life.  His perfect life, his righteousness will be imputed onto us.   Scripture tells us that God will remember our sins no more because they have been covered by the blood of Jesus Christ.  What GRACE (God's Riches at Christ's Expense) and what Mercy God has given each of us.  If you do not know God's Son as Lord and Savior then every word, every deed and every action has been recorded and will be used to condemn those who do not know Jesus as Lord.  This makes my heart sad.  This will be a grave day for the lost, the Athiest and hater of good.

The second question will be good for some, okay for others and a day of regret for those of us who are saved, but know we can do more.  Job in his prime of life did these things for the Lord:

Job 29New International Version (NIV)

Job’s Final Defense29 Job continued his discourse:

2 “How I long for the months gone by, for the days when God watched over me, 3 when his lamp shone on my head and by his light I walked through darkness!4 Oh, for the days when I was in my prime, when God’s intimate friendship blessed my house, 5 when the Almighty was still with me and my children were around me,6 when my path was drenched with cream and the rock poured out for me streams of olive oil. 7 “When I went to the gate of the city and took my seat in the public square,8 the young men saw me and stepped aside and the old men rose to their feet; 9 the chief men refrained from speaking and covered their mouths with their hands;10 the voices of the nobles were hushed, and their tongues stuck to the roof of their mouths. 11 Whoever heard me spoke well of me, and those who saw me commended me,12 because I rescued the poor who cried for help, and the fatherless who had none to assist them. 13 The one who was dying blessed me; I made the widow’s heart sing. 14 I put on righteousness as my clothing; justice was my robe and my turban. 15 I was eyes to the blind and feet to the lame. 16 I was a father to the needy; I took up the case of the stranger. 17 I broke the fangs of the wicked  and snatched the victims from their teeth.18 “I thought, ‘I will die in my own house, my days as numerous as the grains of sand. 19 My roots will reach to the water, and the dew will lie all night on my branches.20 My glory will not fade; the bow will be ever new in my hand.’ 21 “People listened to me expectantly, waiting in silence for my counsel. 22 After I had spoken, they spoke no more;my words fell gently on their ears. 23 They waited for me as for showers and drank in my words as the spring rain. 24 When I smiled at them, they scarcely believed it;the light of my face was precious to them.[a] 25 I chose the way for them and sat as their chief; I dwelt as a king among his troops; I was like one who comforts mourners."

2 questions for you:

Question #1 - Do we know God's Son, The Lord Jesus Christ, as our Savior (is our name written in the Book of Life).  Have we truly surrendered to God's will and turned away from our sins?  Have we put the old self to death (this is a daily battle) and put on our new self.  Scripture tells us to examine ourselves closely to make sure that we are still in the Faith.  The beginning of Wisdom is the fear of the Lord.

Is your life bearing the fruit of the Spirit?

Question #2 - What have we, those of us who are saved, done with what God has given us?   Have we been good stewards of His time, His talent that He gave us and His treasure that He has given us stewardship over.

Blessings,Dante

 

Reshaping Manhood: Strength

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Strength is one of the main biological differences between males and females and throughout history, strength has defined great men. Strength obviously differentiates men and women but strength also differentiates among men. Historically, men who were physically stronger often did better in battle, agriculture, and were seen as more desirable by women and there is no known culture in which weaker men were considered more valuable than stronger men.

Strength is the ability to exert force in accordance with ones will and while history favored physical strength, modern society also leans towards mental strength. Based on the same definition, mental strength could be seen as the ability to carry out tasks or goals based on ones will power and self-discipline. Being a good husband, father, leader, and Christian all requires mental strength, will power, and self-discipline. We all know men who lack these traits and have made their marriages, families, careers, or walks with Christ a train wreck because they lacked the mental strength, will power, or self-discipline required in these areas.

Mental strength, just like physical strength, is an aptitude that can be developed and increased through practice. Angela Duckworth, a researcher at the University of Pennsylvania, studies achievement. She tracked 2,441 West Point cadets spread across two entering classes. She recorded their high school grades, SAT scores, leadership potential scores, physical aptitude and a number of other variables to determine what develops a great leader. She discovered that it wasn’t grades, IQ, or leadership potential that accurately predicted whether a cadet would be successful. Instead, it was mental grit, perseverance, and self-determination to achieve long–term goals that made the difference.

5 Traits for Mental Strength

Set Goals to Improve. Step one is seeing that you need improvement in whatever area in your life you are lacking. Compare yourself to the best not the mediocre and set achievable goals to improve. According to neuroscientists studying Nay SEAL trainees, they found that trainees who were able to pass the most rigorous tests are the ones who set many goals. Not just any goals but very specific goals with short, mid, and long-term milestones.

Segmentation. Segmentation is the process of blocking out distractions and focusing on accomplishing one task at a time to accomplish something. First, you slowly divide tasks, goals, or objectives in small parts then take on your challenge one small step at a time. You focus on the next immediate objective and accomplish that objective without letting your mind worry about the other tasks or the entire magnitude of your goal.

Visualization and Self-Talk – Performance coaches have long used visualization techniques with Olympic athletes and top performers. One study showed that subjects simply visualizing the successfully completion of a task had almost as much success as those who practiced actually doing the physical task. The process involves vividly visualizing yourself successfully completing a goal, task, or a habit that you want to obtain. Each day, you visualize incorporating all the five senses, what it would be like when you accomplish your goals. Another aspect of visualization is positive self-talk. Top performers “talk” to themselves with positive words to keep their spirits up. They are actively aware of negative or self-defeating thoughts and constantly remind themselves that no matter how tough the situation is…it will always end.

Consistency – Mentally tough athletes, performers, and leaders are also more consistent than others. They don’t miss workouts, they don’t miss assignments, and they always have their teammates back. They don’t let short–term distractions, negative feedback, or hectic schedules prevent them from continuing their actions towards their goal or vision. In addition, they make a habit of building up the people around them repeatedly and sharing in victories rather than touting their own contributions and wins or claiming sole responsibility.

Emotional Control - Controlling your mental state is another very crucial skill in mental strength. Most people commonly have erratic or knee-jerk reactions to stressful situations or circumstances. They react out of emotion or the fight or flight response rather than in a calm, methodical manner. The other common reaction people have is the opposite, indecision or freezing up, they cannot make timely decisions and therefore do not act at all. These responses are not unique to high stress situations but even to everyday decision-making. Some people react emotionally or cannot make a decision and fall into “analysis paralysis” but we have more control over our reactions than we think. We often can’t control people or what happens in our outside world, but we can control our interpretation of it and our decision making process in light of it. In high stress situations, top performers breathe deeply and make decisive actions based on logic rather than emotion.

Mental strength isn’t about getting an incredible dose of inspiration or courage from an event; this is why retreats and resolutions usually fall short. Mental Strength is more about building daily habits that allow you to stick to a routine, control your emotions, and overcome challenges and distractions on a consistent basis. This could be with your family, your career, or in your spiritual life.

Throughout the Bible, we find numerous stories of men with mental strength. Many did not start out with mental strength but through the course of their lives and with a trust and faith in God, they developed many of the traits for mental strength. Not only did God use these men to build his kingdom but they also now serve as examples for us to emulate.  If mental strength is about building daily habits and consistency, I challenge you to apply these five traits each day this next week while also reading some of your favorite stories of men in the Bible who exhibit these traits or simply repeat the following verse 10 times throughout each day.

[shareable cite="Philippians 4:13"]I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.[/shareable]

The next characteristic is Courage.

Reshaping Manhood: Intro

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Imagine you were called upon to travel to a foreign country, in a harsh climate, and lead the fight against ISIL/ISIS.  You had to pick a team of five men you know and these men would travel with you and help you accomplish this task.  What attributes would you use to evaluate the men you would choose?  What character traits would you value over others?  Which men would you eliminate from your pool because they lacked the strength, courage, mental fortitude, or trust needed to complete this task?

Masculinity is the opposite of femininity yet over the past 30 years; certain segments of our culture to include academia, media, and the social sciences have implied and tried to get men to think and act more feminine.  Masculinity is also not chauvinism, dominance, sexism, or denigrating femininity.  In a Biblical context, men and women are equal but have separate and distinct roles in relationships, the family, and society.  Even in a non-Biblical context, such as same-sex relationships, each partner assumes one role or the other almost as a basic human relational instinct.

However, as previously stated, over the past 30 years there has been confusion and mixed messages over the role of men and often when I have witnessed anger, resentment, passivity, or unhealthy traits in men and marriages, it often stems from these mixed messages or reversed roles in a marriage.

Manhood is a way to be, a path to follow, and a way to walk in life.  Humans are social creatures and prone to tribal/community living.  Therefore, who we are as men has a lot to do with how we see ourselves in relationship to other males.  If we begin viewing and shaping ourselves through the lens of our culture or through the lens of our wives or other women, this is where men can stray from our identities.  It is not that the culture or women are wrong but they often try to change or “improve” men based on what women or our culture wants from men rather than our unique and separate roles and identities.

Therefore, men should be centering our way to be, our path to follow, and our walk in life based on a Biblical context and from the reinforcement of other strong, Biblical men.  Until a hundred years ago, men banded together in small tribes and communities where their distinct roles were taught from a young age and then reinforced by other men throughout their lives.

Again, imagine you and a small group of men have brought your families to an isolated frontier outpost in the Western United States in the mid 1800’s.  Lurking beyond the perimeter of your outpost are predators, hostile and friendly natives, and other food sources.  Given that all you love is within your outpost, which men would you choose to stand beside you and protect your family?  Which men are willing to fight for what you believe in and hold sacred?  Which men can act decisively and remain calm under distress?  Which men will act selflessly and place the group’s wellbeing above his own?  Again, what character, mental, and emotional traits would you value over others?

While you might never be charged with leading other men in the fight against terrorists or living in a remote outpost in the 1800’s, God has charged every man to lead his family, serve in God’s church, and stand for righteousness and justice.  Over the course of these next few posts, I am going to highlight some distinct, universal characteristics of masculinity throughout history and their Biblical context in relation to God’s plan.  I challenge you to reflect on your own life and walk in relation to these characteristics and with the men you currently associate with on a daily basis.  Not only will you be able to decide which men to choose to stand with you but you will also see if you would be chosen by others to stand with them.

The first characteristic is Strength.